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Film: Nymphomaniac

"For me, love was just lust with jealousy added."


This is about Volume I & II combined, since I watched them one after the other. A man finds a woman passed out in the street, and takes her in. As she rests in his spare bed, she recounts tales from her life as a self-proclaimed nymphomaniac. I’ll brace myself for emails calling me a philistine, but my tolerance for pretentious bullshit has been tested here. Perhaps I’m taking it...

Monday, Aug 29, 2016

Film: The Equalizer

"When you pray for rain, you gotta deal with the mud too."


Denzel Washington plays a hardware store assistant with a murky past, who has a chance encounter with a girl in a diner (Chloe Grace Moretz). They hit it off as friends, but it soon becomes clear she has connections to the Russian mob. When she is hospitalized, Denzel sees red and goes on a rampage to take those motherfuckers down. The Equalizer has a very simple take on the world...

Saturday, Aug 27, 2016

Film: Observe and Report

"I just want you to know I'm gonna make a change. I'm switching to beer."


A dark comedy about a bipolar mall cop (Seth Rogen) dealing with a flasher on the loose. The arrival of a ‘real’ police officer (Ray Liotta) causes some friction. This came out at a similar time to Paul Blart but for two films with the same subject matter, they could not be further apart. Observe and Report is a black as night comedy, with a sometimes deeply unlikeable central character...

Monday, Aug 22, 2016

Film: Weiner

"It was a really big blind spot."


A fly-on-the-wall documentary following disgraced US Congressman Anthony Weiner’s campaign to become mayor of New York. In case you are not familiar with the story, Anthony Weiner was involved in a sexting scandal that started with him posting a dick pic to his public Twitter account by mistake. The documentary kicks off a couple of years later, as his mayoral campaign takes off in spite of his reputation. Then, as...

Friday, Aug 19, 2016

Film: The Shallows

"It's okay... no sharks come here."


A lone surfer (Blake Lively) is attacked by a shark, washes up on a rock and fights for her life as the tide comes up. Well this is probably the surprise hit of the (admittedly shit) summer. Who would have thought that a good ol’ woman vs. shark would be one of the most entertaining things to have come out for a while? The formula is simple. Show the shark...

Thursday, Aug 18, 2016

Take 2: The Bourne Ultimatum

"If you were in your office right now we'd be having this conversation face-to-face."


I had forgotten just how good this one was. Greengrass maintains the frenetic pace of the last film and even steps it up a notch, finding creative ways to keep us entertained. Perhaps the story arc could have had a more interesting conclusion, but as a new spin on the pure-bred spy thriller the Bourne series (or at least the first three) stands as one of the greats.

Tuesday, Aug 16, 2016

Take 2: The Bourne Supremacy

"You told me Jason Bourne was dead."


Paul “Shakin’ Stevens” Greengrass takes the helm for the two sequels and despite my arsy tone, it was a good step for the franchise. This is a superior film to the former in almost every way, and it’s not as if the bar was low. It’s faster, more exciting, smarter and incredibly intense from start to finish. Bourne is on the run and barely stops to take a breather, but...

Monday, Aug 15, 2016